empresspatti ([info]empresspatti) wrote,
@ 2008-02-14 16:44:00
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Romance and Dick Cheney

I don’t have the romance gene.  Mostly, I think romance is sappy and stoopid, and often gets in the way of real love.  Real love is the person who comes and gets you after you’ve thrown up at work. 

 

Romance is when someone gives you a dozen roses because it’s easy to make an online order.  I guess I should also mention that the last time I got roses was in college (The Dark Ages).  The roses triggered a huge asthma attack.  I spent the night in the emergency room sucking on an inhaler.  I’m telling you, VD is dangerous.

 

Glad I won’t be one of the women who are getting that cruddy “Journeys” necklace that was also advertised endlessly at Christmas.

 

I spent a considerable portion of my 20’s and 30's with otherwise sane girlfriends who would get maudlin on VD because they hadn’t found their “soul mate.”  I think women watch too many Sleeping Beauty/Cinderella type movies. 

 

Mr. Wonderful is wonderful, but he spends a considerable portion of life wandering around without a clue (this medical condition is known as Male Cranium-Rectum Disease).  I just suck it up and laugh.

 

VD = Poohey.  Unrealistic romantic fantasy leads to real life disaster, IMHO.  Gimmie a man who knows to change the oil in the car. 

 

Still, in the last few years VD has finally turned into something wonderful.  On Feb 11, 2006 (close enough!) Dick Chaney got liquored up at lunchtime and shot his lawyer buddy.

 

Not fatal, but funny forever.  Thanks Dick!  You’ve really earned your name…

 


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[info]spuffyduds
2008-02-14 10:13 pm UTC (link)
1) DearHub's first-ever present to me was a big stack of Swamp Thing comics. I was thrilled.

2) Best V-day ever? He was working, but had a short break in the middle of the day. Was planning to picnic, but it was cold and rainy. So he set the picnic things out on the dining room table, with the plastic ants from the kids' "Ants in Pants" game since we wouldn't have real ones. *dies of love*

3) The other day we were listening to the Weakerthans "The Reasons," and I said something about how wonderful it was that this was a really sweet, really sincere love song with the line "And you tell me to fuck off/ when I need somebody to." And DearHub said, "Yeah, well, that's what happens when songs are written by somebody who's actually BEEN in love."

4) To sum up: YEAH, what you said.

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[info]empresspatti
2008-02-15 04:10 am UTC (link)
DearHub's first-ever present to me was a big stack of Swamp Thing comics.

And DearHub said, "Yeah, well, that's what happens when songs are written by somebody who's actually BEEN in love."

I think you have a keeper. Love the story about your Son buying roses btw. The things boys have to put up with.....

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[info]enigmaticblues
2008-02-14 10:34 pm UTC (link)
LOL! So true.

I never got maudlin on VD, just annoyed. As T. calls it, it's also "Singles Awareness Day," and so even if you aren't sorry about not finding your soul mate, there still is the pressure to not be single on that one day of the year. Bah humbug. Much better to have a day to celebrate love in all its forms, wherever we find it.

And to laugh. Thanks to Dick for that. :)

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[info]empresspatti
2008-02-15 04:11 am UTC (link)
I never got maudlin on VD, just annoyed.

I wish you could have given a few of my gf's a talking too. Oy - the angst they used to enjoy. I still get tired thinking of it.

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[info]evilawyer
2008-02-15 01:53 am UTC (link)
Gimmie a man who knows to change the oil in the car.

Or who doesn't think it would be a fabulous idea to buy a house that's sliding down a cliff into a river. Yes, I have made sanity prevail, but it was work, I tell you, work. As for VD, I never can get past the fact that St. Valentine was a martyr --- what is really celebrated is how he got killed by having his entrails pulled from his body or something similar. Whenever I tell that to anyone, they think I'm not romantic. Go figure!

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[info]empresspatti
2008-02-15 04:08 am UTC (link)
All true love is WORK! Romance and entrail yanking are just about the same thing, really.

Glad you are living in a mudslide house. Egads! Where would he be without you?

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[info]shapinglight
2008-02-15 01:47 pm UTC (link)
I know what you mean about romance. When I had B/A-type romantic feelings towards my then boyfriend now husband was when I was more miserable than I've ever been in my life, I think.

Things are so much better now that we're friends first and all that other stuff is just a distant memory.

He's never given me anything on VD and vice versa. I'd forget about it altogether if it weren't that you can't due to media hype.

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[info]empresspatti
2008-02-15 04:35 pm UTC (link)
Romantic drama is fun to watch on tv - but hell in real life. I think figuring that out is an important step towards building something real in a relationship.

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[info]ozma914
2008-02-18 11:35 am UTC (link)
Calling it VD -- I never thought of that. That actually says a lot about the holiday.

The trick is to match the present to the recipiant. So, for this Valentine's Day, I brought my love: A sword.

You just gotta know her.

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[info]herself_nyc
2008-02-18 04:39 pm UTC (link)
Happy birthday!!!

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[info]empresspatti
2008-02-19 01:02 pm UTC (link)
Thank you! And thanks for the BD Distance update. My fav gift!

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