empresspatti (empresspatti) wrote,

Staying Alive

Mr. W didn’t leave me. I’m counting that as a win. Egads! I was in fine form today.

Because it’s Friday, when I got up this morning I stripped the sheets off the bed and tossed them into the laundry basket I had dragged into the middle of our bedroom.

I was getting ready to put clean sheets on the bed when I decided to flip the mattress. I called Mr. W and he came upstairs to help. He hadn’t finished his first cup of coffee, but he’s a nice guy who knows how insane I get when The Cleaning Thing is upon me.

As soon as we had the mattress up, I decided that it would be a good idea to vacuum under the bed. So he trudged downstairs, got the hoover and carried it back up to the bedroom. He was helping me move the bedframe when I dropped my side and the under bed supports snapped off.


Then we had to turn the queen sized bed frame on its side to figure out What to Fix, which was a pain in the ass since the floor of our bedroom was littered with mattress, laundry basket, pillows and blankets, vacuum, bedside tables, laps, cords for the phone, chargers etc etc etc. It was like dancing with heavy weights on an obstacle course. Did I mention that we were still in our pajamas?

Mr. W had the thrill of going to Home Depo – twice. Since I wasn’t done being stupid, I decided that Now Was The Time to dust off the ceiling fan. Epic clouds of dust cascaded down on every surface of the bedroom. I had to vacuum EVERYTHING – lampshades, shelves, dresser, floor boards. I had to wash the blankets AND curtains. I had a sneezing fit that blew my ears off.

I did laundry for hours and then had to damp dust my bedroom again because all the muck in the air had settled. I took a shower and realized that I had to move the mattress so I could get to my underpants. By then I was giggling at the stupid, and I still had to yank a queen sized mattress around naked.

Mr. W got to stand in the garage workbench and build new supports for the mattress. Then, as we were getting ready to screw them back into the frame, he noticed a crack in the wood and had to have clamp and glue fun. By then it was 5p and I had promised a friend I would babysit their delightful 10 yr old daughter.

Leaving Tom with the trashed bedroom, I got a definite whiff of “Good Riddance” as I walked out the door. Can you blame him?

I got to eat pizza for dinner with the cute girl who had just gotten her ears pierced. He got to finish repairing the bedframe. Then he got to make the bed, haul the furniture and lamps back into the bedroom and finish the laundry. I got to hear how life was in 4th grade (good) and admire her braces.

I came home to a sturdy bed frame, fresh sheets, blankets, towels and curtains and a shiny clean bedroom. Mr. W is lying beside me snoring and I think he’s too tired to strangle me in my sleep. Boy Howdie, I'm glad I'm not married to me.
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